Coach Hope: Men, thanks for assembling. I know we're having fewer and fewer coaches meetings because A) the season is a loss and B) Coach Tiller is often very sleepy, so I genuinely appreciate you showing up. Here's the thing -- we have the maize and blue this week, who are also 2-6 and whom everyone is beating up on. We need to beat them. Brock, what do you think for this week's defensive game plan? You must have something up your sleeve.

Brock Spack:



Coach Hope: Ah, I see. You're truly a defensive wizard, Brock. But see, here's the thing -- we want to keep Coach Tiller in the dark on our opponent this week -- Shh! Don't say the name! -- because Joe is very... scared of this squad.

[Tiller begins to enter room]

Coach Legg Rock: You mean Michigan?

[Tiller freezes mid-stride, eyes widen]

Coach Hope: Dammit.

[Tiller runs from the room, grabbing Curtis Painter by the arm and fleeing]

Tiller: Come with me, Curtis! I'll save you, my little buckaroo!!