DOMINATION!!!

In a move that is clearly pointed at world domination, a gigantic team of extremely nerdy Purdue professors and students have created one of the largest, fastest supercomputers in the world. The machine, which dethroned IU's "Big Red" as the conference's largest, will be out of date in July of '08.

When asked about the capabilities of the two-room behemoth, one of the teaching assistants replied, "Now everyone in the math department can play World of Warcraft at once...It's quite a breakthrough."