SETTING: A Subway sandwich shop.
Hey, Joe.
Hey, Willie. Why the long face?
Don't be a jerk, Joe. You know what's going on.
What do you mean? No, really.. what's up? I've just been here enjoying my sandwich all weekend. I let Jorge manage. I like to do that when we've got the playoffs wrapped up.
*Eyes Joe suspiciously*
*innocently chews sandwich, wipes dressing from face*
*glances at menu*
So what did you do when you had things wrapped up?
I knew it! I knew you couldn't resist!
Sorry, Willie, but come on... the Phillies? Have you heard Charlie Manuel talk? He's borderline retarded.
Look, Joe, I've had a rough weekend, okay? Okay, okay. *pause*
So who are you starting in Game 1?
Dammit, Joe!
Sorry! I just can't resist! The Phillies? Weren't you guys in first all season? Weren't we in last in like May? I can't remember because I really don't care. I'm just collecting a paycheck.
Whatever, Joe.
You should really order the mesquite chicken and bacon sandwich.
Really? Is it good?
Pretty good. I enjoyed it all summer long.
Oh, that's cool. *stifling giggles*
Yeah, then in September I had a Philly Cheese Steak and it was so good, I relegated the mesquite chicken and bacon sandwich to second place.
You're such a jerk, Joe.
I have an idea, Willie, this will make you feel like a winner all over again.
Joe, get away from me. Wha-- what are you trying to put on my head? Come on, Joe...
Just hold still... there we go. How's that?
Gosh, you know, I actually do feel like a winner in this.