Oh, sure, you thought you wouldn't have to deal with my inane ramblings on baseball. Sure, sure, you thought you could duck it. But you can't. And pretty soon, college basketball will be over and it'll be wall to wall baseball. And you know you'll read because you're just as bored at work as anyone else.
Anyway, in case you haven't heard, the Tampa Bay Devil Rays are at least considering signing Barry Bonds.
Oh, that's just brilliant. I think the "Rays," as they now insist on being known, would consider this. I mean, an aging superstar clouded in controversy and well-known to be a complete prick who demands leather recliners and multiple lockers... yeah, he sounds like a perfect fit for a team that has finished in last place 9 out of the 10 years they've existed. He's definitely the final piece of the puzzle for a title run.
What the hell are the Rays thinking? From the article...
Manager Joe Maddon said Monday he knew "little" about what was going on, but acknowledged some thought has been given to the career home-run leader.
I think you could just stop that sentence at the comma.
It gets even better, too, because the Rays brass is apparently huddling and considering offering contracts to Kenny Lofton (almost 41 years old) and Mike Piazza (40 in September and completely washed up). I think they should sign them all. And maybe lure Fred McGriff out of retirement so they could have an outfield that all falls asleep during games because they're so old.
What else do you expect from a franchise that renamed itself because old people in Florida didn't like "devil" in the name of the team and then chose to rename themselves after sunshine rays despite playing in a dome?