Well, I told you back at the end of March to come on back on October 1 to make fun of me for my picks. (And if you’re really just coming back for the first time, I hope your summer was nice and…well, where the hell have you been?) Anyway, I got three out of eight playoff teams correct, so you can feel free to make fun… but just know that I am still more accurate than a lot of guys who get paid to do this.

I got the same number of playoff teams correct as Hall of Fame writer Peter Gammons! Idiot extraordinaire Steve Phillips also got three right but he gets docked points for picking the Seattle Mariners to win 92 games and the AL West. Vegas Watch says that “it’s possible nobody will ever be this wrong again.” Hee.

As for me, what else did I say that looks at least sort of intelligent?

Surprisingly better than they’re ever expected to be, the Marlins will challenge everybody in the division and probably win more games than they should.

And they were!

They [Phillies] are good but they’re not good enough, plus the Phillies always find a way to disappoint. They have the goods to win the division and I’d tempted to pick the Mets to stumble, but Philly never seems to come through in a big spot.

Doh.

I keep thinking the Brew Crew will actually break through one of these years and since this division sucks so badly, I’ll again say they do this time.

Well, they got in, so I’m putting this in the win column.

No, they’re [Cubs] not going to win the World Series. They’re the Cubs, for crying out loud. And they eeked out a division title last year because nobody else wanted it and then they got obliterated in the playoffs by a marginal team.

Yeah, whoops.

The D-backs made the playoffs last year as the division winner but they were the very definition of a statistical anomaly. They were outscored for the season by twenty runs, which usually means you’re going to be a lousy team. But they got a lot of breaks and one-run wins and it all held together in a cruddy division. It won’t happen this year.

Pretty much.

They [Tampa Bay Rays] also should win more games this year than ever before.

Sweet! (Never mind that I predicted 75.)

[On the Tigers] Biggest splash in the offseason doesn’t always lead to success. It just adds pressure. Plus the Tigs bullpen is a disaster.

Sweetness. I was right about something! Although I had them in second place behind the, um, Indians.

I keep hearing people pick the Mariners. I know they had a good run last year but they completely petered out in the thick of the Wild Card race and wound up 88-74. Not bad, but nothing magical to make us think they’re on the verge of breaking through. They might be in first for a while thanks to the Angels aforementioned issues, but I don’t think they stay there.

Sort of right. At least I didn’t pick them to really win anything.

Anyway, I had the Brewers, Dodgers and Angels all in the playoffs. And the rest wrong. But, hey, as bad as that is, it qualifies me to be an “expert” on baseball for ESPN!